Zen & the Art of Shameless Self Promotion (or “We Are Going To Be Friends”)

WAHM SAHM social media writer blogger working for actual dollars financial freedom dream do succulent iPhone 8

Good morning! (This is being written in real time with minimal edits because if I stop to save and/or edit I will delete it and that would completely defeat the purpose and be a huge waste of time. So, no. Today I am the boss of me. YES! Even the bossiest part of me. Shall I continue? Yes. Yes I shall.)

So.

Hey! I am glad I am here today and I am especially glad you are here today (whichever day that happens to be) because I need to say something and well I could keep saying it to myself – I am a wonderful listener and I think all my ideas are totally brilliant – HAH!, but that isn’t getting me anywhere. I think I should invite you in. Are you cool with that?

So, you know I work in Social Media, right? I mean. I LOVE Social Media and in some ways it loves me back, but through a series of recent events I have come to realize I enjoy getting paid in actual dollars and so I want to use the powers I possess to (maybe) make a bit more of a living wage.

I have two kids (Thing 1; 16 and Thing 2; 12) and there are braces and University degrees to pay for and I have a crazy dream that one day I will own a house (small) with a yard (BIG) and I want to do what I can in the time I am on this planet to live my life to the fullest and make a happy home for my family (and friends, too!). The rapidly aging car is also serving as a constant reminder these days that death is imminent and well, we have to hope for the best and plan for the worst and cars do not last forever, nor do they pay for their own replacements, so I need to dig deep and get my hustle on way more than I have been.

I have been keeping the “social” in Social Media for as long as I have been using Social Media. I do not want that to change. People love to say that things are “not the same” and that it was “better before when people were chatty” and “actual conversations were happening”. Here’s the thing. If I am there, it is chatty. If I am there, there will always be conversation.

I guess what I am saying is this, if you want Social Media to be a certain way then you must forge that path. Forge, as opposed to follow. I mean, that’s what a path is, y’all. You make it. So, do the thing that makes it enjoyable for you.

If you enjoy chatting with a certain person or love following a celebrity or hamburger conglomerate, so be it. You do you!

It comes down to that saying about if you cant find a nice person BE one. You have to be that thing. Seek the good. See the good. BE the good. There are so many ways that Social Media can have a positive impact on the world. Stop looking at the things that drive you bonkers and make you want to toss your devices into the sea. Start focussing on the good stuff.

“The world is full of nice people. If you can’t find one, be one.”

― Nishan Panwar

I want to be you good stuff, you guys.

I have the power. (Peady Powers are real and they are spectacular!)

BUT!

I can only do so much all alone. I can keep writing and sprinkling kindness around like confetti – and I will – but it would be immensely helpful if more actual people could see me. Read my words, see my silliness, like my photos, and maybe, just maybe, feel a teensy bit more hopeful than before they did.

So, I am asking for your help. Please. Will you help me?

If you see a Facebook status or share on Tempered with Kindness that you enjoy, like it. Take the second or two you happen to be there and actually click like or even share it. It will maybe let Facebook know that my tens of readers are loyal and kind and that more than 12 of them would enjoy seeing a post. (Yes. Facebook actually limits what you see. If you want to see more of a certain thing, person, page, you have to make a point of liking those things. Some people also suggest going to your notifications and choosing “see this first” so you will see an actual person, writer, blogger, page or fun thing you love rather than something that pays to be seen. Think BIG businesses with even bigger budgets.)

If you use Twitter (still my favourite!) please follow me – and tell me you have by saying hello or starting a conversation – and I will come see you and we can actually connect. I have met so many fun, smart, kind, and interesting people through Twitter. I love hashtags and have come up with several through the years. One of my favourites is #tweepstopeeps which I use for friends I have made via Twitter who have become friends IRL (in real life!). So, come to Twitter and say hello to @Peady and let’s show the Twitterverse the power of positivity and kindness because we are #connectingnotcollecting. Don’t get me wrong. It’s not all sunshine and roses. I am a parent of a teenager and tween – we are all about #keepinitreal – there are plenty of sarcastic comments and a multitude of “ARGH!” moments. It’s life! Come vent.

Instagram is a really big platform. Everyone is using it! Teens, pets, GINORMOUS brands, your Orthodontist, your favourite gluten free snack. I mean, it is really easy to feel lost in it all. It’s not exactly all about the numbers (remember: connecting not collecting), but to some degree they do matter. I am SO stuck in Instagram. I engage. I share. I tell little stories about my day or photos. I am me – as I always am – yet I cannot seem to get eyes on my posts. Again, just like Facebook (they are owned by the same people) if you like something or want to jump in and chat, please actually take a second and double tap (even from way back… you know… where the trouble’s at?) so I can see you and so you can see me.

I never want engaging with me to feel like a task. I want to greet you the same way I would if I bumped into you at the library or grocery store. Maybe seeing each other would require a put-down-all-the-things BIG hug, maybe we’d chat a while, maybe someone would have a baseball cap pulled low to avoid eye contact because Moms are TIRED, yo! It’s all good. I just want you to know I am here for a reason and so are you and should our reasons align on any given day, it’d be cool to connect. Wouldn’t you agree?

My hope, here, there, and everywhere, is to be able to continue spreading kindness, sharing the good, pointing out injustices in places we can help (because I need hopefulness in my life!), and connecting like-minded individuals for good.

It will help me to get my message out if more people can see it, read it, connect with it.

That is the honest truth. (Is there any other kind? What a weird phrase!)

So, please come and find me in all the places and say hello. Seek the good. See the good. Share the good. BE the good.

Thanks for listening and for helping me to work towards my goals.

Dreams are good.

yokoono2-2x

Goals get things done!

Now, I am going to hit publish before I hit delete. It’s like a constant race against time over here, you guys! 😀

Make it a great day! I hope to see a lot more of you soon.

My Current Mindworm : {A Semi-Regular Series} Prémonition (Coeur De Pirate)

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I can not get this song out of my head. Honestly. I have tried. I keep hearing it on CBC radio and I can’t not listen when it comes on. It’s so good! It pleases my ears. Seriously. My ears have the capability of being pleased and happy. Think, ice cream truck jingly chimes, birds in spring, the sound of an approved purchase on the POS machine at the Apple Store or baby giggles.

Yeah. Like that.

We are talking Hamilton level mindworm here, people! This is getting serious.

So, what’s a Peady to do?

Why, share it with you, of course. This is a three pronged attack to mindworm solution finding.

First of all, I get to hear the song again (YAY!) for completely legitimate, non-losing-my-mind-as-I-type reasons when I go to find it so I can get the details correct in the title of my post and for information sharing purposes.

Secondly, I get to (finally) stop wondering if there is a video (there is!) and share it with you after first watching it myself. Again, this is quality control not obsession, thank you very much.

Here it is!

Thirdly, I get to wonder what the heck that was all about as I puzzle over this music video and if you watch it we can discuss this and puzzle over it together. Oh, I do love a good wondering session.

So, shall we?

What the heck was that all about?

Doesn’t she have a cool voice?

Do you love this song? Do you even know it at all?

If you had a choice would you rather hear the music and skip the video? (Close your eyes and listen. Seriously. Completely different experience.)

Or do you enjoy the visual component, too?

I find myself more confused than anything, to be honest.

It’s obviously a love story gone awry, but why? I need more information!

So, tell me, what songs or artists have you been listening to a lot lately? Are you able to simply move on or does your brain compel you to listen one more time? Can you predict when a certain song will hook you from the first few bars or notes?

When is the last time you really (like, truly, madly, deeply) loved a song?

I can’t wait to hear your thoughts.

In the meantime, I think I’ll watch this Coeur De Pirate video again and try to figure out whether they were going for sexy or scary because – I have to be honest with you here – I am seriously conflicted.

 

 

 

Photo by Mohammad Metri on Unsplash

Saturdays Are Best : Write It Out Edition

Good morning!

It is 10:14 on Saturday March 10th and I have been up for way too many hours for what is supposed to be a relaxing Saturday morning with few obligations. I tried so hard to sleep in, but honestly there are a whole bunch of things on my mind and I am the kind of person who wants everything to be in perfect harmony all the time and this ol’ world hasn’t quite gotten the memo about my perfect 7.5 billion part harmony plan.

The entire world is an awfully big goal, mind you. I get that. I mostly want my teeny tiny part of it to be harmonious, but this week even that has been … well … not good. I mean, if I were Simon Cowell in this situation or even an Elementary School Choir Director, I’d be all …

sighs

Regardless, I must keep calm and carry on. I mean, right? Isn’t that all any of us can do?

Learning to roll with the punches – ugh so violent – go with the flow is an important life skill. You can’t freak out every time something makes you want to freak out. You just can’t. You’d have no energy left to notice the good things. You’d be in a constant state of sadness or stress or downright panic.

I know this because I have been there, done that, and bought the T-shirt.

Well, no. Not quite. I never did actually buy the T-shirt. The T-shirt wouldn’t fit me because I eat my feelings – because STRESS! (but I digress …)

All this to say, it has been a weeeeeek!

Where was I going with this?

Oh, yes! I have a lot on my mind and when I try to avoid certain things they get more and more naggy in my brain. (Seriously? Naggy isn’t a word? Naggy should absolutely be a word. There. I have used it three times. It’s mine! I am leaving it. Gosh darn it!) Do you know that feeling? It’s like when you have to pay a bill or make a dentist appointment or have a conversation that you really, really, reeeeaaalllly wish you didn’t have to pay/make/have? Like that.

Anyway, above all else this blog and its lack of bloggy joy has been in the forefront of my mind and I am feeling rather pragmatic about the entire situation and have decided that I am going all Sid Vicious on the situation. I am going to continue with Tempered With Kindness and I will write here when I can and I will make no apologies for not doing it the “right” way. (HAH! Whatever the heck that even means! Can you say flavour of the month? I can. I can also – and probably already have – eat it whole, but that doesn’t necessarily mean it’s good for me.)

For instance, maybe this post will have a big, beautiful, blog worthy photo. Maybe it won’t. I haven’t decided yet. I am sure we will all find out in due time and I know my patient, faithful, forgiving, tens of readers will respect my decision even if it isn’t the one they would have made. Right? I am not wrong to have this kind of faith in you, am I? No. I didn’t think so. You are my favourite. You really are.

There are approximately as many reasons why I haven’t been writing here as there are off-key voices in my Human Population Choir. (Oh look! We have a name now! Look for us on iTunes any day now with our 100% Hamilton repertoire.) That is a whole lot of reasons! Somewhere in there, there are also a whole lot of excuses and feelings of self doubt. I am pretty comfortable with my humanness, though, so I am not looking for reassurance or bad blogger asylum.

The truth is, if I want to write – and write well – I simply have to put pen to paper or fingers to keyboard and write.

Without making promises.

Without making excuses.

Without making apologies.

Without overthinking.

Without considering all the reasons why I shouldn’t.

Without worrying about who I might bother by speaking my truth.

Without guilt.

Without shame.

Without perfection.

I will write.

I will write.

I will write.

(Look! Three times! It’s mine!)

It is now 11:55 (I’d tell you what else I have been up too, but you already know how Saturday morning Mom duty goes, I bet, so I won’t bore you with the details.) and I am going to hit publish. (OH! YES I AM!) I am going to hit it right now. I am not saving another draft. No. I am publishing.

(No photo. Oh well. sings I did it myyyyyyyy waaaayyyyyyy!)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Signs

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Well, hello there!

Are you still here?

Wow!

You are a really kind person.

Thank you for that.

I sincerely appreciate your presence.

Obviously, I have been absent from this space for quite some time, but you know what? I miss it. I miss you. I miss this space. I miss being able to simply pop in and say hello, share a part of my day, ask how you’ve been, and wait in quiet contemplation and anticipation for any sign of life.

So thank you for all the times you have swung by.

I am eternally grateful for your silent support. I am also grateful for your LOUD support.

I’m not picky.

Fire: bad. Bread: bad. Support: good.

So maybe I needed a sign.

Maybe I needed to seek one.

Maybe the sign I was looking for was so blatantly obvious that I couldn’t see it.

Sometimes we see what we want and it seems so far away when what we need is sitting right in front of us.

It’s like lusting after a pair of Louboutin’s when what you really long for is a wicked cozy pair of fuzzy slippers.

One might make people go “Wow!”, but will it make you go “Wow!”? No. No it won’t. Well, I suppose I can only speak for myself, but one of those would make me go “Oww!” not “Wow!” and is simply not my style, so why bother? I can’t afford the shoes or to waste a single second of my very limited and precious time on this planet trying to make someone else go “Wow!”. Can you?

Allow me.

No. No you can’t.

So …

All this to say, thank you for reading.

I hope you continue to stick around.

I have vowed to post every day in November with the hopes of getting my groove back and forming a new and improved writing habit.

My sign?

November is National Blog Posting Month. (This is where, if we were cartoons, an anvil – or perhaps an old timey typewriter – would fall on my head.)

Yup.

That – in conjunction with a few other doozies from the Universe – is most definitely a sign.

Do you believe in signs? Does the Universe speak to you?

Feel free to tell me a ‘signs from the Universe’ story in the comments. You know I’ll be replying because the Universe told me I have to be here every day in November. It’d be awesome to have something to do. 😉

 

Photo by Austin Chan on Unsplash

Late Night Friday Fun or How to Write a Blog Post in 10 Minutes

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Well, well, well. We made it. Friday at last!

Yes. It’s still Friday. Oh sure, it is just about midnight, but I have vowed to post something new to ye olde blog and that is exactly what I am going to do. Never mind the fact that I have been messing with the space time continuum all week here, there, and everywhere.

What a week! It was good over all, but it felt so long. I had a strong start on Monday, though, and that made all the difference in me surviving a very long week. As opposed to two short weeks in a row. I mean 5 whole school days in a row! Wow! Wait. No. Thing 2 had 5, but Thing 1 only had 4. Plus, as the Mother/Chauffeur, let’s face it, all my weeks are long!

Honestly, this week was a roller coaster. It had me feeling like this on Monday because I finally managed to hit publish.

Tuesday was nice. I made the most amazing tacos for dinner and everyone loved them.

On Wednesday, the rain began.

I was exhausted and couldn’t nap because I am bad at naps. Also, grey rainy days always make me feel so very peckish. Of course, no good ever comes of this.

Thursday was also rainy, but it was an intermittent rain. There were nice little breaks interspersed among the torrential downpours. I had appointments to get to, so I decided to make the most of it.

I was feeling pretty positive on Thursday. I had a positive Parent Teacher interview experience. That is always such a welcome surprise. Thursday was alright.

This was me on Thursday night.

Also this

because balance.

Friday, as usual, arrived just in the nick of time.

My week might best be describes as emotional.

So when I decided that I was going to do as little as possible on Saturday, I most definitely felt like this.

Then I texted my NS BFF and told her I wanted cake.

Because I have a lot of feelings and they are all delicious.

And that is how you write a blog post in 10 minutes.

bows

Now about that cake …

*Full disclosure: This took slightly longer than 10 minutes because Giphy is an internet rabbit hole if ever there was one. Yay, Giphy.

Wordless WEdnesday : Announcing That I Am a #WEFamilies Ambassador (Right Out Loud)

 

WE-Families-Ambassador-Seal

You may have noticed a little badge down and to the right on my blog. See it there? The one with #WEFamilies on it. Or maybe you never noticed at all. Perhaps you only ever use your iThing and you don’t see anything that resides in the sidebar. You can turn your phone sideways and it should magically appear! (Don’t you love learning new things? I’m a giver! Tee hee hee.)

I’m so excited to announce that I am a WE Families Ambassador!

I decided that today was as good a day as any to announce that, here. I have been sharing all things WE for years now, but I was asked to be a WE Families Ambassador late in November 2016, just before WE Day Atlantic.

Obviously, I said yes.

Then life went a bit sideways. As life is known to do. Sometimes that happens, right? I know you know exactly what I mean.

That being said, I have been working behind the scenes here, (there, and everywhere) and decided that I am going to make WEdnesday* (wordless and/or wordy) a semi-regular thing. Out in the open. See? Right out loud!

I won’t always have a WEdnesday post, but sometimes I will and when I do I will share some of the cool things WE are up to with a #WEFamilies twist.

Now, before this so-called (and lets be honest “wordless” is a pretty glaringly obvious misnomer now) Wordless WEdnesday post gets any longer I am going to hit publish!

I hope this Wordless (Hah!) WEdnesday made you smile and I also hope you will follow along as WE do our best to make the world a better place one action at a time.

I have always loved this Hemingway quote.

Never mistake motion for action.

Honestly, these days I find it is especially fitting. After all, that is what #WEFamilies are all about.

*See what I did there?

Motivation Monday {Silly Saves Me Edition}

It will come as a surprise to no one that I have been having a bit of trouble feeling motivated lately, but this morning I am feeling determined to be the one in control of my feelings – and some other stuff, too. Motivation has come home and, much like the prodigal son, I will embrace it and feed it and give it its old room back, and cherish it like never before in hopes that my appreciation for its return will have some big returns for me! Yay, motivation!This is how I operate apparently, so I had better learn to live with it*, right?I am not leaving this laptop without hitting publish. (Because motivation makes me make promises to myself and motivation also makes me keep those promises. Isn’t motivation rad, you guys?)This will be an extremely short post, but I feel like I am in a rip-the-band-aid-off sit’i’ation and I just have to hit publish. This will hurt me more than it will hurt you. Believe me.My point is, I have so much to say and so many ideas and they have just been stagnating, or being forgotten – because of course I won’t remember that great post idea if I don’t have a pen (mine!) and paper (also, mine!) to write it down in a way that will make sense to me at a later more convenient time! I am busy, distracted, worried for the world. Kids come with outside obligations that require my attention. I have to make dinner. I haven’t had coffee yet… You know? ALL the things that everyone faces pretty much every day and somehow manages to live with.Yeah. When the normal stuff of life gets in the way of happy-go-lucky  I am not – wait for it – happy-go-lucky! I do not like that.So I am fixing it little by little and right about now, just after I rip off this bandaid, I will have fixed it just a little bit more. Thank you for your patience and sense of humour. I am happy you stuck around.My tens of readers are actually extremely important to me. I appreciate you.So, while I work out the rest of my day, this week, this month, an editorial calendar that will bring me back here more often, and my entire life going forward**, I will leave you with this beautiful motivational quote.

You can tell it is inspirational*** because it is a nature photo and there are words on it.

That’s all it takes, right? 😉

How are you holding up? No really. I’m asking. How’s your motivation these days? I know I am not the only one who feels the way I do.

What do you do every day, week or month to keep your motivation revved up? What do you do to spark it if ever it drops?

You should know that Thing 2 just walked in my room *juuuust as I started that second sentence with pen (mine!) and paper (math test) saying, “Sign.”. I replied, “You’re interrupting me.” and explained further, “If you enter my room and see me very obviously trying to do something with this (points to face) look on my face, please do not make demands. Leave your things for now and I’ll sign them momentarily, but going forward this is not ok.”

So, I’d like my adulting sticker and a gold star, now, please and thank you.

**No pressure.

***Source: Deviant Art.****

****Full disclosure! Inspiration for this inspiration: A silly, yet completely honest, conversation on Saturday with a dear friend wherein I succinctly ahem nailed my annoyance with certain habits of certain online presences.

 

25 Things I Have Been Busy Doing That Have Prevented Me From Blogging


The B word.

No. Not that one. The other one. The really, really, really, horrible one.

Yeah. That one. You guessed it.

BUSY!!

None of us can escape it these days it seems and so I thought maybe instead of apologizing for it or for not blogging consistently I would swing by and post something off the cuff with zero apologies for people who don’t understand and with the confidence that most of you are in the same boat and will absolutely be able to relate.

Also, because we are all very busy, I have decided that a numbered list is the most efficient way to share what it is I want to say. A list is so much easier to digest, right? (I mean BuzzFeed is practically 100%  made up of listicles and BuzzFeed would never steer us wrong.)

So without further ado, I give you ~

25 Things I Have Been Busy Doing That Have Prevented Me From Blogging 

(I may need to work on the name of the list. Meh. I’ll worry about that later.)

  1. Being consumed by the news of the world.
  2. Worrying about blogging.
  3. Worrying about not blogging.
  4. Eating too many carbs.
  5. Worrying about eating too many carbs.
  6. Missing lunch dates with dear friends.
  7. Worrying about missing lunch dates with dear friends.
  8. Missing coffee dates with some of my favourite people.
  9. Trying to find time to organize coffee dates with some of my favourite people.
  10. Worrying about never having coffee dates with some of my favourite people ever again.
  11. Trying to build a business.
  12. Worrying about building a business.
  13. Wondering who the heck I think I am that I can build a business.
  14. Worrying about why I don’t think I have what it takes to build a business. I do. Shut up brain!
  15. Working online all the time. All. The. Time.
  16. Worrying about working online so much.
  17. Not exercising.
  18. Not eating well.
  19. Forgetting to take my iron.
  20. Worrying about why my iron is low.
  21. Being tired.
  22. See number 19. Derp.
  23. Over promising and under delivering.
  24. Worrying about letting *everybody* down *all* the time.
  25. Flipping rapidly back and forth between ALL THE FOMO and considering hermitage as a valid lifestyle.

I have limited my list to 25 things because I know you’re busy, too. Who has time to read 26 things?!? Slackers! That’s who! (I’m considerate like that.) This list could easily have 100 things.

I have one husband and two children. A lot of my busy is for them and/or because of them. I know I’m not the only one delivering the occasional lunch to school, but waiting for nearly 30 minutes for a kid to come and fetch it might be a uniquely me experience. (This week. Grr. I was so annoyed. Totally learned a new thing, though. Apparently, High School lets out at 12:30 for lunch. Mmhm. It’s nearly the end of November, you’d think maybe someone might have mentioned that by now, but you’d be wrong.)

Anyhoo …

Life, right?

So, before I can think myself out of hitting publish I’m going to hit publish.

How has your Fall been? Are you also suffering from the B word?

How are you handling the news of the world?

Do you have a surefire remedy for wanting/not wanting simultaneously to do ALL the things?

Feel free to mull those questions over (and to post answers in the comment section!) while enjoying one of my favourite busy day mindworms.

My Current Mindworm : {A Semi-Regular Series} Got Your Number (Serena Ryder)

Serena Ryder Got Your Number blonde bob so cute rock on
Have you heard this?

I love it!

I think the first time I heard it was this summer when we were embarking on a road trip and it set the tone for our whole vacation. Happy. Sassy. Lots of attitude, but ultimately another totally awesome feel good tune from Serena Ryder.

Also, I really love her hair in this video.

Now I want to get my hair all chopped off and dye it summer blonde.

Hmm.

Good thing I didn’t share a Sinead O’Connor video.

What have you been listening to lately?

Full disclosure. I am currently listening to the final concert of Celtic Colours International Festival from beautiful Cape Breton Island and now all I can think of is home and how much I miss it. (You can listen to it for the next 24 hours, but then it will go poof.)

Quick! Tell me something good!

What’s your favourite genre of music?

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My Current Mindworm {A Semi-Regular Series} : Ain’t It Fun (Paramore)

Paramore, Ain' It Fun, living in the real world, the real world, happy music

love this song!

Every time I hear it I get happy. It’s a perfectly catchy pop song with just the right amount of sass. LOVE!

The video is pretty interesting, too. Check out all the ridiculous world records Paramore broke while filming it. Isn’t that hilarious? There’s bonus footage of each record being broken. You have to see it to believe it. Silly! (And you know I love me some silly!)

I am also sharing this right this minute because I am thinking about my friend Sarah (HI SARAH!) who is diving into the (so-called) real world today. GO, mamma! Go!

You got this!

I hope this makes you smile. Then I hope it goes into regular rotation on your Happy Music playlist because it totally is happy music. Right?

I think so!

Do you have a Happy Music playlist?

I definitely have a running list of songs that will always make me smile, giggle, then laugh, burst out into song, and whip up a kitchen dance party like nobody’s business.

Maybe it’s time to add a new tab up there labeled “Happy Music”. What do you think? (Fully aware that music posts don’t bring a lot of traffic. Don’t care. I care to share because I care. If one person is inspired to dance in the kitchen, then yay!)

What’s your mindworm today?

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